Here’s today’s miracle. This afternoon I got the long-awaited email that our temple is moving to phase 3. I got online and of course, there were very few endowment sessions available and none at times that Kevin and I can go. But I did manage to schedule a sealing session for us in August. Then I switched over to initiatories and was completely stunned to be able to make a reservation for July 1. Five seconds later, all the initiatory sessions were gone and five seconds after that, the temple reservation website crashed. Now here is the miracle part. I have a family name that the baptism and confirmation were done pre-COVID. Since the temples closed, that name has been stuck on my magnet board. With the reservations I was able to make today, I can do the initiatory for that name on July 1, the endowment when Nathan goes for his own endowment on July 2, and the sealing when Kevin and I go in August. It all fell into place perfectly. I can’t explain it any other way than to say that there was some divine intervention.
Showing posts with label tender mercies. Show all posts
Showing posts with label tender mercies. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 23, 2021
Thursday, March 26, 2020
A Multitude of Tender Mercies
Do you ever have days when the weight of the world seems just a little bit heavier? When you can’t seem to cope as well as normal? When the light of the Savior seems just a little bit more distant? When the adversary is working extra hard to influence you? Around here, we call those dark days. Yesterday was a dark day for me, the first I’ve had in the midst of this whole Coronavirus crisis. In fact, it’s the first I’ve had in a really long time. It made for a rough day, especially because I didn’t recognize it for what is was until late in the day. And from the perspective that I have now, I don’t think it was accidental. I think it was an attempt to muddle my mind and spirit as much as possible on a day when there was an important decision to be made.
Yesterday afternoon, amidst my funk, Daniel’s mission president called. What he told me is that the reason we’ve been on such an emotional rollercoaster is because they have been getting different directives every day. I completely understand that. We’ve seen the same trend. Conditions in the world are changing so quickly that the church, and everyone else, is doing all it can to keep up. The mission president told me that he thought they finally had the conclusive word on how it would be determined which missionaries would be going home for health reasons. All missionaries with health conditions, regardless of the severity of their condition, are considered high risk. As such, everyone’s highest priority is to keep them safe and healthy. Then I was told that the decision was in our hands. I told the mission president that Kevin and I would counsel with Daniel, he gave us permission to call Daniel, and left his phone number with me so we could let him know when we had come to a decision. He said there was no hurry.
At that point, I waited for Kevin to finish up a video meeting (having him working from home has been good for my mental health this past week) and then caught him up on what had happened. We reached out to Daniel and my first impression was that his state of mind was enormously better than it had been the day before. His companion had given him a blessing, he had prayed, pondered and studied, and his mind was much clearer. We asked him how he was and basically, he had received his confirmation from the Lord that if he ended up going home, the work he had done, his offering as a missionary, had been enough. With that, he was a bit more at peace concerning the will I stay or will I go situation. We told him about the mission president’s call, and we decided to take some time to pray and consider and talk again a few hours later. Kevin counseled Daniel to call the mission president himself and seek his guidance on the matter.
Daniel did call the mission president and then called us back only a few minutes later. Although we had been told there was no rush, realistically, the president needed a decision by noon the following day. That kind of ramped up our stress level because suddenly, we had a time limit. We left Daniel to think and pray and went to talk to our other kids. We explained the situation and asked for their help as we sought to find the right answer. After some prayer and a priesthood blessing to help me clear my mind and get out from under the darkness that I was feeling, Kevin and I stepped into our room to discuss our impressions. The thing that had come clearly to my mind was the first bullet point of our family motto. (Yes, we have a family motto. How that came to be is a whole different story however, so I’ll save it for another day.) It says we “follow the prophets.” I knew that was my answer because although the decision had been placed in our hands, the prophet had asked that any missionaries with health conditions be sent home regardless of the severity. Kevin’s answer came in the form of the fact that in his mind’s eye, he could not see Daniel in Oregon in the fall. The only place he could see Daniel was at school. Just as soon as Kevin had explained his impression, my phone buzzed, and it was a text from Daniel. “Have you had any thoughts?” Don’t try to tell me that is coincidental. The Spirit obviously works over great distances. We asked if he did and he responded in the affirmative but told us he wasn’t ready to talk yet but was just curious.
A few hours later, as we neared the appointed time to talk with Daniel and after the other kids had gone to bed, Matthew crept out of bed and came to tell us that he had woken up and had a feeling that Daniel should come home. We thanked him for sharing his impression and a few minutes later, we linked up with Daniel again. We asked for his impressions first and he told us two things. First, he talked to his mission president and the president said something that got him thinking about obedience to the prophet. The prophet said all those with health concerns should come home. The second thing he shared was that looking forward, he couldn’t see himself as a missionary anymore. His conclusion was that he felt he should come home. He felt fulfilled as a missionary. Kevin and I then shared our impressions and we confirmed the suspicion that the promptings we had all been given had occurred at pretty much the same time. At that point, the decision was pretty much made, but this was a big decision, so we opted to sleep on it, pray a bit more, give ourselves a few hours to ruminate, and talk again the next day.
Earlier today, as we were getting ready to talk to Daniel once more, I asked Nathan if he had any thoughts concerning the matter. He told me that he really felt fine with Daniel either staying in Oregon or coming home. He then went on to say that while he didn’t see Daniel’s asthma as really being serious, if the prophets said that all those who had health issues should come home, shouldn’t we follow the prophet? I almost laughed out loud at that point. The Lord has most definitely heard our prayers and we had all been given the insights we needed.
When Kevin and I spoke to Daniel again, we all confirmed that our thoughts had not changed overnight. Daniel called the mission president and when he explained the choice that had been made and the reasons why, the president referred him to Official Declaration 1 in the D&C which states the Lord will never let the prophet lead anyone astray. The decision officially made and reported, Daniel called us one last time. There was sadness in his face, and he admitted to feeling sorrow at the thought that his mission will be officially over in just a few short days, but he is also at peace. He has received his personal confirmation from the Lord that not only is this the right choice, but what he has offered in his six months was enough. He says he feels fulfilled as a missionary. He shared an impression he had, and I think it was the turning point from grief at coming homing home early and that calmer disappointment mixed with the knowledge that the Lord has another plan for him. “When people talk about a sacrifice to the Lord, they often mean something that they gave up to serve a mission. I’ve never thought of a mission as something to sacrifice to the Lord until now.”
It took only a few hours to get his travel information. Daniel will return home on April 1. He will need to self-isolate for 14 days, but we had a completely unexpected and gratefully accepted offer from some beloved neighbors to let him spend his two weeks in the mother-in-law apartment in their basement. It has its own entrance as well as its own bathroom and a full kitchen which will make his confinement much more pleasant than it would be in one 8’ ft square bedroom in our house. It will also not put our wonderful neighbors at risk. I don’t know if they fully understand just how much this means to me, but I love them all the more for the great service they are doing for us. They will surely be blessed for their generosity and their willingness to minister.
We have seen many tender mercies in the past few days. The Lord is aware of us and our needs and he gave us all the guidance and discernment we needed to be able to make the right choice. It was a difficult decision, one of those that was between a good thing and a better one when we didn’t know which was which in the Lord’s eyes. It has left me feeling humbled and so grateful for the light and knowledge I have in my life. It has shown me great love and concern he has for each of us. And it has left me feeling so grateful for the spiritual maturity that Daniel has gained in his few short months in the mission field. He hit his six-month mark yesterday. He’s grateful for the time he was given, short as it was. Yes, there is still sadness and disappointment. He only served in one small city. He never got to see any other parts of the mission or any of the wonderful things the state itself has to offer. He never got to teach a family. He never had the opportunity to baptize anyone. But the number of converts does not determine the measure of a missionary and Daniel knows that. As I’ve said before, he has made his peace with the decision. My mama heart is still sad for the experiences he will never have, but that’s for me to take to the Lord. With time, I suspect that will fade. As for the future, Daniel is excited to see what work the Lord has for him next. What an amazing attitude. I love his sense of optimism and his willingness to be where the Lord wants him to be. In short, he knows that he must be about his Father’s business. And he is happy and willing to do so.
Yesterday afternoon, amidst my funk, Daniel’s mission president called. What he told me is that the reason we’ve been on such an emotional rollercoaster is because they have been getting different directives every day. I completely understand that. We’ve seen the same trend. Conditions in the world are changing so quickly that the church, and everyone else, is doing all it can to keep up. The mission president told me that he thought they finally had the conclusive word on how it would be determined which missionaries would be going home for health reasons. All missionaries with health conditions, regardless of the severity of their condition, are considered high risk. As such, everyone’s highest priority is to keep them safe and healthy. Then I was told that the decision was in our hands. I told the mission president that Kevin and I would counsel with Daniel, he gave us permission to call Daniel, and left his phone number with me so we could let him know when we had come to a decision. He said there was no hurry.
At that point, I waited for Kevin to finish up a video meeting (having him working from home has been good for my mental health this past week) and then caught him up on what had happened. We reached out to Daniel and my first impression was that his state of mind was enormously better than it had been the day before. His companion had given him a blessing, he had prayed, pondered and studied, and his mind was much clearer. We asked him how he was and basically, he had received his confirmation from the Lord that if he ended up going home, the work he had done, his offering as a missionary, had been enough. With that, he was a bit more at peace concerning the will I stay or will I go situation. We told him about the mission president’s call, and we decided to take some time to pray and consider and talk again a few hours later. Kevin counseled Daniel to call the mission president himself and seek his guidance on the matter.
Daniel did call the mission president and then called us back only a few minutes later. Although we had been told there was no rush, realistically, the president needed a decision by noon the following day. That kind of ramped up our stress level because suddenly, we had a time limit. We left Daniel to think and pray and went to talk to our other kids. We explained the situation and asked for their help as we sought to find the right answer. After some prayer and a priesthood blessing to help me clear my mind and get out from under the darkness that I was feeling, Kevin and I stepped into our room to discuss our impressions. The thing that had come clearly to my mind was the first bullet point of our family motto. (Yes, we have a family motto. How that came to be is a whole different story however, so I’ll save it for another day.) It says we “follow the prophets.” I knew that was my answer because although the decision had been placed in our hands, the prophet had asked that any missionaries with health conditions be sent home regardless of the severity. Kevin’s answer came in the form of the fact that in his mind’s eye, he could not see Daniel in Oregon in the fall. The only place he could see Daniel was at school. Just as soon as Kevin had explained his impression, my phone buzzed, and it was a text from Daniel. “Have you had any thoughts?” Don’t try to tell me that is coincidental. The Spirit obviously works over great distances. We asked if he did and he responded in the affirmative but told us he wasn’t ready to talk yet but was just curious.
A few hours later, as we neared the appointed time to talk with Daniel and after the other kids had gone to bed, Matthew crept out of bed and came to tell us that he had woken up and had a feeling that Daniel should come home. We thanked him for sharing his impression and a few minutes later, we linked up with Daniel again. We asked for his impressions first and he told us two things. First, he talked to his mission president and the president said something that got him thinking about obedience to the prophet. The prophet said all those with health concerns should come home. The second thing he shared was that looking forward, he couldn’t see himself as a missionary anymore. His conclusion was that he felt he should come home. He felt fulfilled as a missionary. Kevin and I then shared our impressions and we confirmed the suspicion that the promptings we had all been given had occurred at pretty much the same time. At that point, the decision was pretty much made, but this was a big decision, so we opted to sleep on it, pray a bit more, give ourselves a few hours to ruminate, and talk again the next day.
Earlier today, as we were getting ready to talk to Daniel once more, I asked Nathan if he had any thoughts concerning the matter. He told me that he really felt fine with Daniel either staying in Oregon or coming home. He then went on to say that while he didn’t see Daniel’s asthma as really being serious, if the prophets said that all those who had health issues should come home, shouldn’t we follow the prophet? I almost laughed out loud at that point. The Lord has most definitely heard our prayers and we had all been given the insights we needed.
When Kevin and I spoke to Daniel again, we all confirmed that our thoughts had not changed overnight. Daniel called the mission president and when he explained the choice that had been made and the reasons why, the president referred him to Official Declaration 1 in the D&C which states the Lord will never let the prophet lead anyone astray. The decision officially made and reported, Daniel called us one last time. There was sadness in his face, and he admitted to feeling sorrow at the thought that his mission will be officially over in just a few short days, but he is also at peace. He has received his personal confirmation from the Lord that not only is this the right choice, but what he has offered in his six months was enough. He says he feels fulfilled as a missionary. He shared an impression he had, and I think it was the turning point from grief at coming homing home early and that calmer disappointment mixed with the knowledge that the Lord has another plan for him. “When people talk about a sacrifice to the Lord, they often mean something that they gave up to serve a mission. I’ve never thought of a mission as something to sacrifice to the Lord until now.”
It took only a few hours to get his travel information. Daniel will return home on April 1. He will need to self-isolate for 14 days, but we had a completely unexpected and gratefully accepted offer from some beloved neighbors to let him spend his two weeks in the mother-in-law apartment in their basement. It has its own entrance as well as its own bathroom and a full kitchen which will make his confinement much more pleasant than it would be in one 8’ ft square bedroom in our house. It will also not put our wonderful neighbors at risk. I don’t know if they fully understand just how much this means to me, but I love them all the more for the great service they are doing for us. They will surely be blessed for their generosity and their willingness to minister.
We have seen many tender mercies in the past few days. The Lord is aware of us and our needs and he gave us all the guidance and discernment we needed to be able to make the right choice. It was a difficult decision, one of those that was between a good thing and a better one when we didn’t know which was which in the Lord’s eyes. It has left me feeling humbled and so grateful for the light and knowledge I have in my life. It has shown me great love and concern he has for each of us. And it has left me feeling so grateful for the spiritual maturity that Daniel has gained in his few short months in the mission field. He hit his six-month mark yesterday. He’s grateful for the time he was given, short as it was. Yes, there is still sadness and disappointment. He only served in one small city. He never got to see any other parts of the mission or any of the wonderful things the state itself has to offer. He never got to teach a family. He never had the opportunity to baptize anyone. But the number of converts does not determine the measure of a missionary and Daniel knows that. As I’ve said before, he has made his peace with the decision. My mama heart is still sad for the experiences he will never have, but that’s for me to take to the Lord. With time, I suspect that will fade. As for the future, Daniel is excited to see what work the Lord has for him next. What an amazing attitude. I love his sense of optimism and his willingness to be where the Lord wants him to be. In short, he knows that he must be about his Father’s business. And he is happy and willing to do so.
Wednesday, January 11, 2017
Tender Mercies
As I mentioned on Monday, the past week has been an emotionally difficult one for us. But in the midst of everything, we’ve been the recipients of a multitude of tender mercies from the Lord. On Sunday I was given a very clear reminder that in spite of the fact that Matthew has had a number of allergic reactions over the years, we’ve never needed to use his Epipens. He has always thrown up almost immediately which clears the allergen from his body. I’m not good with vomit (that’s always been Kev’s job), but it is truly a blessing in comparison to anaphylaxis.
Yesterday evening the youth gathered for their weekly activity. They made a scrapbook of memories about Tanner to give to his family and then each one was able to write a message to Tanner on a balloon which they then released. Nathan really wanted to be there, but he is on the stage crew at the middle school this year and was scheduled to be at an event until 8:00 last night. However, the event started on time and everything went so smoothly that he was home by 7:20 and was able to make it to most of the activity. He still has some coping to do, but I think it was good for him, gave him a chance to share some memories and say goodbye. Another small but much appreciated blessings.
Daniel is the one of our kids that we’ve had the most trouble with in terms of our strict food rules. We’ve had numerous come to Jesus talks about not leaving peanut butter cup wrappers in the bathroom, not eating in his room, washing hands after handling or eating not Matthew friendly foods, cleaning surfaces of any residual allergens when he opts not to wash, etc. There have been uncountable eye rolls and huge sighs like I’m making him rip off his own arm and eat it. There has been grumping and complaining and a lack of cooperation from time to time. All our kids know that Matthew could die if he ate the wrong thing, but mortality is a nebulous idea to many kids and teens who feel like they will love forever. I think Tanner’s passing has made Daniel realize that we’re not exaggerating the seriousness of the situation. His rebellious attitude about the subject has dissipated. I’m sorry it had to be such a severe event to help him understand, but that understanding and cooperation is also a blessing for our family.
In the past week, I’ve also been reminded of how many good people are out there. Sometimes I think we get caught in our own little Mormon bubble and forget that we don’t have a monopoly on good people making good choices and loving their fellow men. This week has been a reminder to me that there is an abundance of good people out of the church as well as in. A friend of Tanner’s family set up a Go Fund Me account to help pay their medical and funeral expenses. It was posted on facebook and in 3 days, they raised $30,000. As I scrolled through the names of those who donated, I realized that there were a multitude of people donating who do not live in this area and are not related to Tanner. The vast majority of the donations were between $20 and $50. I saw several that were around $100, but the enormous amount of money was raised by an enormous amount of people each giving just a little. What a fabulous reminder to me that there are good people everywhere, all doing their own little part to make the world a better place.
Let me pass on a little advice. Take a minute. Count your blessings. Hug your kids extra hard. Tell them you love them. Make sure to express your gratitude to the Lord. And always remember “that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass.” (Alma 37:6) I’m enormously grateful for these small blessings, these tender mercies that the Lord has given us as we work through this struggle.
Yesterday evening the youth gathered for their weekly activity. They made a scrapbook of memories about Tanner to give to his family and then each one was able to write a message to Tanner on a balloon which they then released. Nathan really wanted to be there, but he is on the stage crew at the middle school this year and was scheduled to be at an event until 8:00 last night. However, the event started on time and everything went so smoothly that he was home by 7:20 and was able to make it to most of the activity. He still has some coping to do, but I think it was good for him, gave him a chance to share some memories and say goodbye. Another small but much appreciated blessings.
Daniel is the one of our kids that we’ve had the most trouble with in terms of our strict food rules. We’ve had numerous come to Jesus talks about not leaving peanut butter cup wrappers in the bathroom, not eating in his room, washing hands after handling or eating not Matthew friendly foods, cleaning surfaces of any residual allergens when he opts not to wash, etc. There have been uncountable eye rolls and huge sighs like I’m making him rip off his own arm and eat it. There has been grumping and complaining and a lack of cooperation from time to time. All our kids know that Matthew could die if he ate the wrong thing, but mortality is a nebulous idea to many kids and teens who feel like they will love forever. I think Tanner’s passing has made Daniel realize that we’re not exaggerating the seriousness of the situation. His rebellious attitude about the subject has dissipated. I’m sorry it had to be such a severe event to help him understand, but that understanding and cooperation is also a blessing for our family.
In the past week, I’ve also been reminded of how many good people are out there. Sometimes I think we get caught in our own little Mormon bubble and forget that we don’t have a monopoly on good people making good choices and loving their fellow men. This week has been a reminder to me that there is an abundance of good people out of the church as well as in. A friend of Tanner’s family set up a Go Fund Me account to help pay their medical and funeral expenses. It was posted on facebook and in 3 days, they raised $30,000. As I scrolled through the names of those who donated, I realized that there were a multitude of people donating who do not live in this area and are not related to Tanner. The vast majority of the donations were between $20 and $50. I saw several that were around $100, but the enormous amount of money was raised by an enormous amount of people each giving just a little. What a fabulous reminder to me that there are good people everywhere, all doing their own little part to make the world a better place.
Let me pass on a little advice. Take a minute. Count your blessings. Hug your kids extra hard. Tell them you love them. Make sure to express your gratitude to the Lord. And always remember “that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass.” (Alma 37:6) I’m enormously grateful for these small blessings, these tender mercies that the Lord has given us as we work through this struggle.
Wednesday, June 15, 2016
A Tender Mercy
This evening I took dinner to one of the ladies I visit teach. She just had a baby, so food was in order. This is by no means an out of the ordinary event, but she has Celiac disease and can’t eat any gluten so there was a need for some careful planning and cooking. The out of the ordinary part of the experience was all on my side. For the first time ever, I felt a rush of gratitude for Matthew’s allergies. I’m not grateful that he has them, of course, but I’m incredibly grateful that all the struggles we’ve had have helped me be able to serve someone else who is in a similar situation. This is one of those all too infrequent moments when I can actually see how my trials have brought some good into my life.
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