Staking Her Claim

All of last school year, Nathan was repeatedly queried about whether he was going to this or that school dance. The fact that he was not going because he was not sixteen yet was his response, his safety net. I’ve warned him in the past that once he turned sixteen, he was no longer going to have an easy out. In response to similar questions regarding last Saturday’s homecoming dance, he asked Sariah, one of his best friends. That was a safe and socially acceptable choice, but in the minds of all the teenage girls, his going to the dance was an indicator that he is now on the market.

Yesterday afternoon, Nathan told me that the Madrigal women were already talking about who they were going to ask to Sadie Hawkins, the next school dance and a traditional girls’ choice event. He was flabbergasted about how early they were making plans, but I explained to him that girls just think that way. They plan much farther in advance than boys and they have to talk about all of it so that everyone knows who is claiming which boy in order to avoid huge amounts of teenage girl trauma and drama if someone’s preferred date is asked by someone else. He didn’t really get it, but he’s a teenage boy, and the minds of teenage (and honestly, any age) boys and girls just work differently.

At just after 7:00 a.m. this morning, Nathan sent me the following text:

Yup. Yesterday was the female powwow about who gets to ask whom and today the plan went into action. Nathan is even more flabbergasted and I’m just laughing over my Cheerios. The dance is in six weeks and the girl in question is, in fact, one of those Madrigal women that was making plans and staking claims yesterday.

I fully expect Nathan to get asked to pretty much every girls’ choice dance of his high school career. He is a talented, smart, kind young man, one who also happens to be tall and pretty easy to look at. I’m his mom so I know I’m biased, but he is kind of a cutie. Try as he might, he’s never going to understand how those girls think, but at least I can steer him down a safe path in order to avoid as much “wrath of teenage girl” as possible.

The First Dance

Homecoming at the high school was on Saturday. Due to a tiny bit of peer pressure, Nathan decided to go and asked one of his good friends to accompany him as his date. Luckily for all of us, his friend happens to be a girl. 😜 He’s not a huge fan of the all-day school dance event, so it was fortuitous that a good number of his group had conflicts throughout the day. They did have a picnic lunch with a subsequent Nerf gun battle, but other than that, Nathan left at 6:00 pm and arrived home at 11:30. That’s a very respectable length of time for a school dance. He did have fun, minus the fact that he had a headache by the time he came home, so hopefully this inaugural sock hop will warm him up to the idea of future dances. Because I suspect that he will end up going to nearly all of them. Based on some of his experiences last year, the girls have just been waiting for him to turn sixteen…

Revenge of the Nathanisms

Most kids say funny things when they are young, but of all my kids, Nathan is the one whose language choices made me laugh the hardest. Matthew inspired lots of laughter as well, but he did funny things. Nathan is the one who said funny things. His toddler-esque turns of phrase were so hilarious that in his linguistically formative years, he had his own sidebar on the blog dedicated to “Nathanisms.”

As a toddler, he called flip flops “boo bops” and instead of antlers, reindeer had “reindeer sticks” and unicorns had “unicorn pokers.” He shared a room with Daniel and slept in the bottom “bonk” bed. Joseph Smith saw to “jelly beans” (heavenly beings) shining brighter than the sun. He knew that a “Barbie” (barber) shop was where you can shred your hair. And his penchant for the sciences began to show when he complained about a stinky smell on the school bus and told me that he wasn’t smelling it, but the molecules kept getting in his nose.  He also understood the importance of an education because he explained, “The more I learn, the more tighter my brain gets screwed in.” And perhaps my favorite Nathanism of all time: "We made a snowman without any parts. Just the balls."

Nowadays, he has a tendency to play with language, loves long words and describes himself (very appropriately, may I add) as verbose. When the Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary app quite sending him a notification with the word of the day, he was bummed. He has become such a wordsmith that I’m always proud of myself when I toss some vocab his way and discover that I know a word he does not. Earlier this year I called all my boys a bunch of troglodytes. He had to look it up, but now he uses it regularly. He is in high school, so the word is appropriate on many different occasions and I can rest assured that at least once in a while, I still know stuff that he does not. 😉

Earlier today, Nathan crafted yet another phrase that made me laugh out loud. There’s been some drama amongst the high school Drama Officers (Ironic, right?) and since Nathan is one of them, he often finds himself caught in the crossfire. In the wake of the latest bit of havoc caused by their general lack of advance planning, Nathan called them all turd buckets. He then proceeded to qualify that with, “Excuse my Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints swear words. I was going to say Mormon swearing, but that’s wrong.”

I may not be quite as memorable as the snowman without any parts, but it was still funny!

Countdown to the Big Day

I had a rough day yesterday. I think it is because with Daniel’s (non)farewell scheduled for today, the thought that he is really leaving really soon became really real really fast. He’s my oldest child and I’ve never done this before, so in general I have no idea how I’m going to react to things. Yesterday, things felt enormously overwhelming and that kind of took me by surprise. I mean, I’m a mean plan in advancer, the last of the food was prepped and the last of the shopping was done several days ago. Family and friends were all notified, tables and chairs borrowed, the house was cleaned…as far as things that can be checked off a list, I was good to go. But I think the mama in me got the best of me and I had to take a minute to cry out some emotions.

Today is better, probably because I’ve actually admitted to myself that we are now counting down days instead of weeks or months and because we had a multitude of family and friends show up to give Daniel, and all the rest of us, their support. Daniel has been very blessed in that he has a solid group of friends that he has known since elementary school. There have been additions along the way and the importance of one friend over another has shifted from time to time, but he has always had someone he could talk to and on whom he can rely. And we have amazingly supportive families, both Kevin’s and mine. They are always here for us and our kids and I’m more grateful than I can express to know that they have our backs. My kids count their cousins amongst their friends and don’t just hang out with them because they are related. They genuinely enjoy being together. Our house was full to overflowing with well-wishers and it reminded me of just how blessed my family and I are to have such an extensive support system.

The topic Daniel was asked to speak about in sacrament meeting was “using the Book of Mormon to convert myself and others.” He chose to lean a bit more toward the process of conversion and how the Book of Mormon is only a part of that process. The three points he covered were 1) the Book of Mormon teaches plain and simple truths in simple, easy to understand language, 2) the Spirit is who actually testifies of truth, and 3) we all have agency and conversion is a choice that every person must make for themselves. Kevin and I were both impressed with his depth of understanding. So often we hear stories about how missionaries have converted people, but in reality, the missionaries teach, the Spirit testifies, and then each person chooses whether or not to accept and live by the principles they have been taught. I had quite a few people comment on how great this talk was.

Although I felt a bit watery eyed from time to time today, I didn’t have an actual emotional breakdown. I fully expect there to be at least a couple breakdowns in the next ten days, but for today I’m doing ok. Daniel’s going to be fine and I am confident that he can feed himself, keep his clothes clean, and won’t actually die of the plague. Once all our visitors left, he shared with us the scripture he has selected to go on his missionary plaque. “Yea, and they did obey and observe to perform every word of command with exactness; yea, and even according to their faith it was done unto them; and I did remember the words which they said unto me that their mothers had taught them.” (Alma 57:21)

Dang it. So much for not actually crying today. Let the bawling commence. Honestly, I feel like I won the kid lottery. I have some of the best kids there are.

Quality Sibling Time

With just under two weeks until he reports to the MTC, Daniel has made spending some time with his siblings a top priority. Malia’s class has been reading “Charlotte’s Web” and to go along with that, they will be having a third-grade fair next month. There was also a school sponsored coloring contest (not really a contest because everyone who participated got the same prize) that promised a free ticket to the state fair to every child who participated, so with free ticket in hand and a story to give her some context, Malia really, really, really wanted to go to the fair. Luckily for her, she is off track, so she and Daniel spent the day at the state fair.

Malia got to pet a baby goat, a piglet, and a calf. The lamb was only four days old, so she didn’t get to pet that one, but she did get to see it and said is was, “So cute!” She did, however, get to make a little bracelet out of wool. She and Daniel also saw art, photography, leather working, and a giant butter sculpture. They had a great time!

Malia is the one who will change the most in the two years Daniel will be gone, so I’m grateful that he has a desire to spend time with her now. Matthew has expressed the thought that once Daniel leaves, nothing will ever be exactly the same and he’s right. This is a big change for all of us, just the first of many yet to come. As such, I’m really glad Daniel is taking time with his siblings now. Matthew’s turn is tomorrow. They have plans to attend the temple. They are both looking forward to it.

The Message in the Music

When Kevin turned twelve, his grandmother gave him a framed print of a painting entitled “Christ, Our Pilot.” That picture has hung by the door of every place he has lived since then as a reminder to let the Savior guide him when he steps out into the world. Our children have been looking at that painting all their lives and over the past few years, the image has been referenced many times as we’ve counseled with and taught our children. Several years ago, we gave each of them a print of their own for Easter and it has even become the lock screen image on several cell phones.

With this particular painting being such a big part of our family culture, the hymn “Jesus, Savior, Pilot Me” has also become a favorite for most of us. It isn’t a hymn we sing all that often in church and it is unfamiliar to many, but in our minds the song and the image fit together perfectly. When Daniel was asked to do a special musical number in sacrament meeting, it was his first-choice song and he and Nathan found a soprano solo arrangement that worked very well as a clarinet solo.

Daniel performed today with Nathan at the piano and it was absolutely beautiful. The Spirit flowed into the room and I found myself misting up a bit because of the message of the song, the beauty of the music, the gratitude that my oldest son has made this song and image an anchor for his faith, and because this will be the last time Daniel performs before he leaves on his mission. With all that rolling around in my mind and heart, I’m actually really proud of myself for just misting up and not becoming a complete mess of tears. But I know that I was not the only one touched by the music. The stake president happened to be in our sacrament meeting today (our two speakers were one recently returned missionary and one who is preparing to leave-they happen to be brothers) and he was moved to tears. After the meeting, he sought out Daniel and Nathan to thank them for sharing such an amazing musical number and to ask for the name of the person who arranged the music. The boys happened to have two paper copies, so they simply gave one to the stake president.

There is power in music. It can invite the Spirit like nothing else. It can soften hearts and inspire minds. It can provide comfort and bring peace. It can create joy and express emotions that are difficult to explain in words. It can be an incredible tool for good. I’ve known that my entire life. I’m so grateful that my children have also discovered the power of music and are using it for good. And I’m grateful that they are learning to let the Savior be their constant guide. With him by their side, they will not be led astray.

So...

It looks like the milk waffles are not a resounding success. Matthew has eaten a small waffle (about 3” square) every day this past week with no obvious problems. This morning we ate milk waffles for breakfast. Matthew had a full serving after which he had the same “not feeling right” reaction that he had last Saturday. He described it as feeling like he had a golf ball in his throat. Like last week, it passed in about 15 minutes, but to me it says that his body is not ready to tolerate that much milk.

I don’t see this as a failure. I see it as proof that he is less allergic than he once was. I also see it as a valuable bit of info gained. Matthew is disappointed that the milk waffles have not gone as smoothly as the egg waffles. He really wants it to work. But he’s also smart enough to know that not now doesn’t mean not ever. So now I call the doctor and figure out our next step. Based on the info she gave us at Matthew’s last appointment, I suspect it will be continuing to explore eggs, with cookies being next on the list. But we’ll see. The doc is the expert and she may have different ideas.

Washed Clean

Malia has been looking forward to her baptism for many months. Time flows slowly for a 7-8 year old and the wait has seemed long for her. When she decided what she wanted her dress to look like earlier this summer, it seemed like the first practical step in the process. As the summer has progressed, our preparations have progressed as well. Things have kicked into high gear over the past several weeks as we worked to sew her dress, bake cookies, invite family and friends, select and print her baptism memory book and interview with the bishop. As each step was completed, she got more and more excited. As of today, the wait was finally over.

Due to the way our stake handles baptisms, we did not get to participate in the program in any way. However, it was important to Malia to have her family be a part of the event, so she asked Nathan to baptize her. He has done so many baptisms for the dead over the summer that he had to think really hard about the differing words for a living ordinance. Kevin confirmed her and Malia asked Daniel to stand in the circle since he now holds the Melchizedek priesthood. Matthew got to say the opening prayer and I was on clean, dry clothes duty.

Since Malia is my only daughter, I’ve never really been able to participate in the actual baptism in any way. Kevin was always the one to help the boys get ready and get them dry and dressed afterward. Being able to walk to the font with Malia and help her out afterward was surprisingly emotional for me. It is a well-known fact that I’m a giant cry baby so it should be no surprise that tears were shed, but they were accompanied by a feeling of such pride in the good choice that she has made. The world is becoming an increasingly dark place and as such, my kids are faced with even more opposition and pressure than I was at their age. Despite that, their testimonies are growing with each good decision they make, and they are constantly learning and increasing in faith and understanding. Malia has taken a big step forward on the gospel path today. I know she will have trials to endure and difficult choices to make in the years to come, but the choice she made today means that she will have the Spirit to help and guide her in every step. If she continues to make righteous choices, she will never be alone.

Malia’s light is shining brightly today. I can see it in her eyes. She’s happy. So am I.

The primary asked us a few questions to they could introduce the kids to those gathered at the baptism. I thought it might be fun to include some of the info we put on Malia’s paper.

Three words that describe your daughter:
1.    Precocious
2.    Sociable
3.    Happy

Malia’s favorite scripture story or favorite scripture and why:
    Jesus calming the angry sea. It reminds her not to be afraid.

Malia’s favorite primary song:
    Baptism

Malia’s favorite food:
    Spaghetti

Favorite thing to do/play:
Drawing and writing stories.

Fun Facts: Three interesting things about Malia…
1.    When she grows up she wants to be a horse rider, a ballerina, a teacher, an artist, and a mom.
2.    She is related to John Hancock. He is her 3rd cousin 8 times removed.
3.    She is named after her mother, grandmother, great grandfather, great-great grandfather, and great-great-great grandfather.