A Series of Confessions

It’s that time of year again. Time for the patriotic pedicure. Instead of paying someone else this year, we opted to pretty our toes ourselves. I’ll freely admit that I’m nowhere near as good as the professionals, but the result was still highly satisfying. I’m a little embarrassed to admit that when my toenails are showing the red, white and blue, I spend far more time admiring them than I normally would. It just makes me happy to have a little outward expression of my inner feelings about my homeland.

Doing our own nails also meant we could indulge in a potluck breakfast. Baked coconut pineapple macadamia French toast. Yum! I’ll be honest, I look forward to these potluck events because it gives me an opportunity to indulge in things that I normally wouldn’t make at home due to the food allergy part of our lifestyle. It has always been my goal to make our home as inclusive as possible for my allergic kiddos and while I’m happy to do that, sometimes I miss the forbidden foods, like nuts. So cooking for non-allergy folks gives me a little bit of relief from the rigid food needs of my tribe.

Now, to completely change the subject…

Lately, I found myself more emotional than usual. Yes, the crybaby gene is always a force to be reckoned with, but it has been even a bit more overactive of late. I know it has to do with the fact that my oldest child is preparing to leave. When I think about missionaries, I get watery eyed. When I hear marching band or saxophone music, I mist up. When I think about how much can happen and how much life can change in two years, I get a little weepy. I have no doubt that Daniel is doing the right thing and I’m enormously proud of him for making the decision to serve. I’m just an emotional mother dealing with the fact that after eighteen years of physical, emotional, and spiritual nourishment, it’s time for my first son to leave the safety of home and venture into the world on his own. And while I try to hide the fact that my emotions are even more volatile than usual, I have a feeling the secret is going to get out.

A Prayer for the Missionaries

I was at the temple again today, this time with my sisters and my parents. We did an endowment session this time and when we got to the prayer portion, a prayer for the missionaries was included. It made me realize that in almost every single session in every temple all over the world, a prayer is said for the missionaries. That’s a lot of prayers. As a mother of a soon to be missionary, it caught my attention as it never has before and made my eyes well up. What a blessing to have so many people praying for the wellbeing of all those, young and old, who are sacrificing their time to preach the gospel.

Bao…Wow?

Nathan’s best friend likes trying new foods, which is good since he will be going to the Philippines (the home of balut-google it and gag if you don’t know what it is) on his mission this fall. Since Nathan has taken to bragging about his Chinese heritage (mostly because people look at him and don’t believe him unless he is with Daniel, me or one of his more Asian looking cousins), he wanted to give Tate (the best friend) a sample of the goodness that is Chinese home cooking. So he convinced me (and he didn’t even have to talk very hard) to make char siu bao for lunch today. We thought we’d get all fancy and try to make them the traditional pleated way. I looked up a YouTube video (it was all in Chinese but since I just needed the visual it all worked out) to figure out how it is done. The lady in the video made it look super easy, but it was not quite as simple as it appeared. We gave it our best shot and some of them turned out ok…

…some, not so much.

But they all tasted good! As far as looks go, please remember that we are all watered down Chinese born in Utah and give us a break. 😉

Building Families

Kevin and I went to the temple this morning. We did a sealing session, which we’ve done frequently of late and which I’ve really enjoyed. Listening to the words of the sealing ceremony on a regular basis has been a great reminder of all the blessings associated with the covenant. Anyway, we didn’t have any family names to take so we were working on temple names. I was acting as a daughter and as always, I tried to think about the person for whom I was standing in. When the second name came up, I heard the names of the parents and realized she was a sister to the previous daughter. As I made the connection, I could feel a grin starting. It isn’t often when doing temple names to have family members come up together and it felt like a blessing to be able to have those two sisters sealed to their parents on the same day during the same session. But that wasn’t all. By the time we were done, there were four sisters. It immediately made me think of my sisters. I’m one of four sisters and I’m blessed enough to be friends with them as an adult. The sealing ordinance is all about building families and being able to participate in the sealing of multiple siblings was an amazing reminder of what it’s all about.

Of all the blessings that the gospel brings into our lives, I think the eternal family bit is my favorite. Eternal life wouldn’t be all that amazing it I didn’t have them by my side.

Do You Want Cheese with That?

In the aftermath of the emotional deluge of the past two days, I spent a few minutes today learning about the Oregon Salem mission. It covers a diagonal northwest to southeast swath of Oregon and encompassed both urban and rural areas. Accordingly, the missionaries ride bikes in some areas and drive cars in others. There are coastal areas as well as farming areas. And probably the most exciting thing, for me at least, is the fact that Tillamook is in the Oregon Salem mission. For those who might not know, Tillamook is the home of some super fantastic dairy foods. We are kind of cheese snobs in that we don’t buy store brands or even local brands of cheese. We prefer the Tillamook and even early in our marriage, when our lifestyle could be classified as Early American Poverty, we always splurged on the cheese. I’m ridiculously excited about the prospect of driving up there to bring Daniel home at the end of his mission and being able to take a trip to Tillamook to sample all the fabulous dairy at its peak of freshness.

Daniel is excited too, and not just about the cheese. 😊

And the Answer is…

Oregon Salem Mission. In the United States. Where we can mail him stuff. And Amazon deliveries are a thing. And phone service is stable and affordable so he will be able to call us each week if he wants to do so. Big, giant mommy sized sigh of relief. I would have supported him no matter where he was sent in that I trust that the Lord knows what he’s doing and all that, but I am a little bit relieved. And Daniel is excited. So excited. I’m sure there’s some fear and anxiety underneath all that at the prospect of being kicked out of his home for two years, but the excitement is bigger just now. He reports to the MTC on September 25, so we have three more months to spend with him. It feels like a reasonable amount of time to get him ready, although I suspect it will take me much longer to figure out how to be the mama of a missionary.

Reality Comes a Knockin’

A few days ago, while we were still on vacation, our bishop sent Daniel a message letting him know that his mission call would probably come today or next Tuesday. Since today was the day Daniel was scheduled to get his wisdom teeth removed, we were all hoping that it would be next week. But life is full of irony and just a few minutes after Daniel got home and settled, we heard a cotton garbled exclamation of, “Oh look. My mission call came!”

I’ll admit that my heart rate increased, and I felt a little bit panicky. Remember a couple of weeks ago when I said the whole graduating from high school thing didn’t feel real yet? Having the mission call arrive was definitely a bit of reality seeping in, one I was expecting without knowing how I would react.

Because he was swollen and numbed up, Daniel opted to wait until later in the day to decide whether to invite everyone over tonight so he could open it or wait a few days. He waffled throughout the afternoon, but as dinner time approached and he still could not feel most of his face, he decided to wait until tomorrow. Kev thought I might not be able to handle the stress of waiting, but to be honest, after that first initial burst of anxiety, I’m actually ok. And since this is Daniel’s thing, Kev and I are happy to do whatever he prefers and made sure he knew that. So tomorrow we find out where Daniel will spend the next two years and how much longer we have until we need to deliver him to the MTC. I’m trying to adopt Daniel’s attitude of “I’m happy to go wherever the Lord wants me to go.” But to be just a little bit honest, I’m really hoping he isn’t being sent to some war torn, politically unstable part of the world where he will go to sleep each night to the lullaby of gunshots or political activists. It’s just the mom in me not wanting my child in harm’s way day in and day out.

And FYI-Daniel didn’t do anything weird or embarrassing as he was waking up from the anesthesia this morning. He just lifted his arm to ponder the IV that was still in it and that was about it. He did repeat himself for a little while, having forgotten he had already said things, but even that only lasted a very short while.

Because the Gospel is Key

We all have a bit of a vacation hangover today, but it was so good to sleep in my own bed last night! This morning we jumped right back into our regular Sunday routine which meant family home evening and our Come Follow Me study time.

Kev had the lesson today and he invited us to think about spiritual lessons learned from our time in Yellowstone. Kev shared with us the fact that there is a delicate balance in Yellowstone, a balance between fire and regrowth, between the different animals in the food chain, etc. When the wolves were eliminated from the park nearly a century ago, that balance was thrown off, although it took decades for the effects to become evident. Reintroduction of wolves back into the park rebalanced the ecosystem and it is thriving today. The gospel connection Kev made was the idea of balance. We all need to work together and help each other.

He also talked about the devastating wildfires that ripped through Yellowstone in the summer of 1988. There was so much destruction that it was thought that the park would never recover. But the park bounced back in amazing ways. Within weeks there were new trees and other plants growing up from the ash. In spite of the magnitude of the destruction, the park not only regrew, it flourished. Repentance is like that. No matter how bad things are, there is always a way back.

For me, one of the things that stood out was how many spectacular things we saw and the fact that Heavenly Father created this amazing world for us. He created all it’s beauty and wonder for us to enjoy. Yes, life can be hard sometimes, or most times, but he made roses so that we could take time to smell them. Despite any and all difficulties we may encounter, we should take time to bask in the multitude of awe-inspiring things this world contains and be grateful for them.

Another gospel parallel I found in Yellowstone is the need to stay on the path. There are signs posted all over to stay on the boardwalks in order to prevent harmful consequences. But in most places, there aren’t actually rangers posted to enforce the rules. The gospel is like that. Our Heavenly Father has given us a path, one that we need to take if we want to make it back to him. He has also given us the agency to choose whether or not to stay on the path. But safety is only found by walking the road he has shown us.

Daniel spoke in sacrament meeting today. He had been asked to talk about his experiences in seminary. He used our vacation to illustrate what he felt was the most important thing he learned in those four years. There is no cell service in Yellowstone. All service drops off just about as soon as you drive through the gates. As a result, there were no texts, Group Me alerts, phone calls, etc. whenever we were in the park. He explained that while he was in Yellowstone, the effects of the world were diminished. He likened that to the need for us to stand in quiet places in order to hear the Spirit. The Spirit won’t compete.

I’m so grateful for this week that I got to spend with my family. I’m so grateful that we were able to experience and enjoy a few of the many wonders this world contains. And I’m so grateful that the gospel is a part of our lives, that all we do and all we are is inexorably intertwined with the truth with which we have been blessed.