Further Musings of a Mother

Let’s talk a little bit about being the mother of a missionary at Christmas time. Thanksgiving was much easier than I thought it would be. Daniel isn’t usually in the kitchen during the mass pie baking and he was able to call on Thanksgiving, so although he wasn’t with us to eat turkey, we talked, and I felt like we got to share the holiday with him. The Christmas season thus far has been alright. Just occasionally I’ll feel a pang knowing he won’t be home with us. Matthew’s concert this week was one of those moments. But overall, I’m ok. Being able to chat with him each week via Skype really softens the fact that he isn’t here.

Last night was the ward Christmas party and although I’m in the relief society presidency and was neck deep in getting everything ready to go, our bishop and our relief society president (who just happens to be married to our bishop) kept a little tidbit from me. We currently have seven young men and women from our ward serving full time missions. One more came home just last week, and there are two more leaving in the next six weeks. That’s a lot of missionaries from one ward. They are amazing youth. The theme for our ward party was “He is the Gift,” in reference to the Savior. What I didn’t know was that the bishop emailed each of the missionaries from our ward and asked them to send a video of their thoughts concerning Christ and how he is the gift of Christmas. I didn’t know about it until suddenly, Daniel was up on the screen bearing his testimony about the Savior and all he means not just to all of us, but to Daniel personally. And so of course, I cried right there in the middle of the ward party. Why, you might ask? First of all, I’m just a huge crybaby, which we all know. Second, Daniel’s Christmas packages had gone in the mail yesterday morning and that was a bit of a reality check for me. And third, I had an enormous, crazy mix of emotions going on. I’m so incredibly proud of him, of the choice he made to serve, how hard he works and the tremendous spiritual growth I’ve already seen in him. On the flip side, his birthday was last week, and we weren’t able to celebrate with him (although there was a package sent for the occasion). And this is the first year that I won’t have all my little crew here with me to celebrate Christmas. As a mother, there are many firsts-first words, first steps, first days of school, first dates…so many joyful milestones in the lives of my children and our family. This is another first for us, but I find it much more bittersweet than many of our other firsts. This is the first year that my first child will be away for Christmas. I know there will be other many more Christmases in the future that will find us without a child or two or more, and I have no way of knowing how I’ll react to those, but this first one is hurting my heart a little. I know Daniel is where he is supposed to be and I wouldn’t want him to be anywhere else, but my mama heart aches just a bit.

So overall, I feel like I’m handling things well. I find modern technology to be a great blessing. Technology, combined with the new rule that allows missionaries to call home weekly, keeps us connected across the miles. And Daniel will be able to call on Christmas, so we’ll be able to share the day with him that way. But every once in a while, I feel a pang. I guess it goes along with the job title of “mom.”

Second Party of the Year

Apparently, it has become a known fact that Daniel and Nathan are very musically inclined. Not only are they both participating in the Christmas sacrament meeting in multiple capacities, but they were asked to perform for the ward Christmas party as well. This year the party was a breakfast with a short program at the end during which Daniel and Nathan played a couple of numbers. They were happy to give their time, Daniel just had to rush out afterward to make it to a band event.

Malia was thrilled to be able to have a tete-a-tete with Santa during the party. She is fully aware that there is no possible way that he is giving her a horse for Christmas, but she had to toss in the request anyway. She had several other things on her wish list, things that are probably more likely to show up in her stocking. We’ll have to wait and see what Santa decides to bring!

After moving from Murray, the infrequency of ward parties out here has been a change. The Christmas party and the July block party are the only two parties the ward has each year. I kind of miss the camaraderie and sense of belonging the more frequent parties fostered, but I think my kids enjoy the parties and hopefully they will have fond memories of these ward events like I do of the frequent gatherings I attended growing up.

Deck the Halls...

....with boughs of holly

We started off this holiday season by putting up our Christmas decorations. For the first time in many years, not all the fragile ornaments were on the top of the tree! With no more babies or toddlers in the house, we were able to distribute the breakables all over the tree. Malia and her cousin Kate lucked out and got to decorate two Christmas trees each because they helped my parents decorate their tree.

'Tis the season to be jolly…

We kept ourselves busy all month with parties, games, activities, etc. We attended our ward Christmas party in which Daniel and Matthew were shepherds in the lamest nativity reenactment I’ve ever seen. All the characters just walked in circles around the stage over and over while Kevin read the nativity story from the scriptures. Daniel in particular thought it was super dumb and I don’t blame him. The party was a big success for Malia though. She got to run around with her friends and got to talk to Santa. She was super excited about the whole thing (even though she does not look excited in the picture) and was not ready to leave when the party was over.

We also went to Kev’s extended family gathering and Daniel and Nathan impressed everyone with their musical skills. This evening we gathered with my family and after dinner the little kids participated in a less-lame-but-probably-a-bit-more-sacrilegious nativity reenactment. There were fewer participants than in the past as all the cousins Nathan’s age decided they were too old for such things. However, Nathan did step in to help Malia gain the appropriate altitude for her role as the angel. Matthew and Drew were the silliest wise men ever.

Matthew and Malia were off-track all month, so we did our activity advent to keep them entertained. We made cookies, read stories, played games and did a variety of crafts. We tried to do the things the big boys were interested in on the weekends so they could participate as well.

We even sent a Christmas card and wrote a family newsletter!

Don we now our gay apparel…

My niece Sarah got married on Dec. 17 and she asked the little cousins to be flower girls so I spent much time (and only used a few swear words ;-) ) sewing a super full, totally spin-worthy dress that Malia loved. The whole wedding had an Audrey Hepburn feel and the style of the dress was a perfect fit.

Troll the ancient Yuletide carol…

I missed Daniel’s concert in the fall because Malia was sick, but we both got to attend his Christmas concert. I was very impressed! In spite of having three different directors in three years, the band program at the high school is going strong and I was really impressed with how good they are. Daniel is in the jazz band (which only has 16 kids in it including the pianist and the percussionist) and the wind symphony (which is the audition only band). Having missed the fall concert, I did not realize how few of the other sophomore bandies we know are in those two groups. It made me one proud mama. 😊

Nathan also had a Christmas concert. It is a pleasure for him to be in a choir composed of people who want to be there rather than being in one full of kids who are in choir because they hate it less than band or art. Having some desire to be there means the kids actually look like they are having fun and the choir director always chooses some super fun songs. As the closing number of the concert, all the choirs sang a song together. They sang in a completely darkened auditorium and as they sang battery operated candles lit up all around the room and up the aisles. It was a really lovely effect and a great touch for a holiday themed event.

Malia didn’t have a concert, but she did have her very first dance recital. She tap tapped and tippy toed to some Christmas music and while she said she did a great job on her tap number, she forgot her ballet number and told me so after the fact. She loved wearing the sparkly (glitter shedding) costume and had a great time. I do need to tell her to smile while she dances though so she doesn’t look so grim.

The recital was also a big night for Nathan. He is on stage crew at the middle school this year and the dance studio rented the auditorium for the evening. Unfortunately, the stage crew kids could not get into the school when they needed to and as a result, there were some technical difficulties during the recital because they had no time to do the pre-show checks that they normally do and the previous rental group had changed a bunch of things in the booth and on the stage. He was pretty stressed out. But Kev bought him a shake on the way home by way of emotional therapy and he was able to shake it off pretty well. And as a random note, Nathan is going to be cleaning up glitter for a very long time.

So it has been a busy season for us. But we’ve had a lot of fun and we’ve definitely sung some fa la la’s!

I Wonder If This Is Why People Get Drunk

Is it really just something to break up the boredom?

Tonight was our ward Halloween party and the entire thing consisted of one game for the kids at the very beginning and then one of the ward members acted as DJ and played music. That's it. Sum total of activities. The kids were all running amok because they were all sugared up and had nothing to do. It reminded me of a junior high school dance where there are like three people dancing and everyone else is just standing around awkwardly. Kev said it reminded him of those Stake Stand Arounds that were called dances when we were teenagers. I've never wanted to see a rousing game of pumpkin bowling more in my entire life. The one high point of the evening was the boost to my ego when my cookies were among the first to disappear. Here are the few we had left at home.


So for all those folks who serve on the activities committee in my previous ward, you guys rock!