My, Oh My, What A Wonderful Day!

Tonight while we were sitting at the table eating dinner, out of nowhere Matthew started singing: "It's the truth, it's actual, Ev'rything is satisfactual.  Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah . . ."

I just love preschool!

(And I went to the library this morning all by myself.  Preschool rocks!)

Confessions of a Domestic Goddess

It takes a lot of hard work, trial and error, and outright failure to become a domestic goddess.  And most household divas aren’t even trying to bake their way to greatness without using milk, eggs, or nuts of any kind.  So I will be the first to admit that while the majority of things that come out of my kitchen are quite tasty, there is definitely a learning curve for creating greatness with soy.

This week has been full of moments that are bound to make me a better goddess . . . eventually.  After our stressful Sunday, we spent Monday doing nothing more productive than making pie.  I mean, anyone who spends the night wondering if their house is going to burn down deserves pie the next day, right?  So Nathan and I ventured out just long enough to pick up a can of pumpkin and we made pie.  However, this was my first attempt at egg and milk free pumpkin pie and while the results were palatable, they were definitely not stellar.  But “not stellar” would be a compliment for the non-dairy cool whip substitute I attempted to accompany the pie.  All I had to show for that experiment was an enormous mess.   And the soy yogurt I tried to make yesterday was an abysmal failure.  But since this is the first time I’ve tried to make yogurt of any kind, I don’t know if it was the soy products that messed everything up or just me.

So after a week full of learning experiences (It’s not really failure as long as I learn from it, right?), I had an emotional need to create something blissful.  One of my new favorite websites yielded a recipe for a delightful fall confection: half apple crisp, half apple pie, all delicious.

And it was.  So overall, I would call this week a success.

This Is How Much Matthew Loves Preschool

He let me take a picture of his face.  And he was happy about it because we were taking a picture of his apple art.

Dear Mr. Computer Hacker

You stink.  And I’m not talking about your lack of personal hygiene, although I suspect that if the most fulfilling part of your life involves creating new and exciting ways to screw up other people’s computers, a daily visit to your own personal hacker cleaner may not be high on your list.  No, the whiff of Eau d’Swine that I am referencing has much more to do with the fact that you seem determined to completely hose up the computer of a completely unassuming housewife (who, by the way, does shower on a regular basis) who is just trying to use the internet to enrich her life.  I mean, how is it your business if I want to find out how to make regular rolled oats into quick cooking oats so I can make a treat for my poor asthmatic children who have been cooped up in the house all week due to a wildfire-induced decrease in air quality?  And what’s more, it’s nobody’s business but my own if I want to spend a few minutes of my precious free time making some attractive additions to my jewelry box and need a few new ideas. 

I’m sure your goal is to bring down the huge corporations of the world to take away power from “the man” or some other such drivel, but in the process you are seriously cheesing off this average American housewife.  And despite the fact that I am computer savvy enough to recognize what is happening so most times I can shut everything down before any serious damage is done, this infantile attempt to make your mark on the world is only marking you as an individual in serious need of a swift kick in the hindquarters . . . preferable administered by a red, four inch spiked heel.

So get a life.  Or even better, get a wife.  She’ll have you whipped into shape in no time.  And she’ll give you more productive things to do than wreak havoc on my sanity.  Of course, the most heinous “honey do” list in the world is probably better than you deserve.

Most Sincerely Ticked Off,

Been-Zapped-Twice-In-Just-Over-A-Week

Slime Time

This week is my boys' last week off-track and they have been cooped up inside.  Nathan has been running around the neighborhood a bit, but with all the smoke in the air, Daniel has been pretty much stuck inside.  So today we made the morning a bit less boring my making slime.  We've made slime before, but this time I used a slightly different method and was much happier with the results.  As for the boys, slime is slime so they enjoyed themselves.  Daniel thought the whole thing was scientifically awesome.

Nathan was pretty skeptical during the mixing phase of the slime, but recovered admirably once it was all finished.

Matthew just flat out enjoyed himself.

So if you are need of an inexpensive inside activity, go ahead and get slimed!

It Was Definitely Not A Restful Sabbath Evening

Yesterday afternoon during our visit from the home teachers, the light in the house all of a sudden turned orange. After a minute it became bright and sunshiny again. This occurred repeatedly over the half hour visit and as the home teachers were leaving, we went outside and saw huge plumes of smoke billowing front the mountain range behind our house. As the plume wafted in from of the sun, the light filtering through turned orange. Since there was obviously a fire somewhere, Kev arranged to get info from one of our home teachers as needed and we headed off to my parents' house for Sunday dinner.

At about six o'clock we heard that homes were beginning to be evacuated, so we headed home to prepare. The boys were pretty concerned (Okay, I'll be honest. I was pretty concerned.) so as soon as we arrived home from my parents’ house, we had a family prayer to calm the boys and then they got their backpacks and packed some clothes and the most important blankets and stuffed animals. Daniel and Nathan put shoes and socks back on with their pajamas so they would be ready if we needed to leave. Then we stood at the back door and watched the fire . . . and took pictures of course. I mean, a huge raging wildfire happening in your backyard is a once in a lifetime experience . . . unless you're really lucky like me and get to repeat a childhood trauma as an adult.

7:15 p.m.-We can see the glow and the smoke coming from behind the second ridge.

The fire was obviously growing and as the sun began to set, the size of the fire became more readily apparent. We could hear the helicopters flying overhead and Kev was listening in on his ham radio to try to stay abreast of the latest developments.

7:55 p.m.

Matthew was pretty nervous until we saw the flames crest the top of the ridge. Then he got downright panicky. “I’m scared of that real fire!” Me to, kid. Me to.

8:15 p.m.-The first flames are visible as they crest the second ridge.

It was a whole lot of not funny how fast the flames were moving. Within just a few minutes the whole side of the mountain was on fire.

8:30 p.m.

After the quick exit I had to make with the kids when there was a gas leak a few years ago, I got a few things organized so that we could grab the most important things quickly if we needed to leave in a hurry. Kev and I streamlined that even more, making a list of the key items and where to find them in case of a fast leave taking. Once we had the necessary items gathered and in the cars, I wandered around the house collecting a few irreplaceable things. We had time and we had space in the car so I figured I might as well grab the nonessential but sure to be sorely missed items that we could not replace. And I have to admit that as I walked around, I found myself thinking that most of what we own is just stuff. The few irreplaceable things I had gathered were an extremely small percentage of what actually fills our house. On the upside, moments like these are when having a tote bag fetish comes in handy!

After about nine p.m. we could no longer see the flames from our back porch which might sound like a good thing but was in fact the exact opposite since it meant that the flames were too low on the mountain to be visible. Kev took to the streets to check in with neighbors and to monitor the progression of the fire from yards with better viewpoints. The evacuation area spread rapidly for a time and I kept expecting to need to rouse the boys from their beds and hit the road. Several of the high points of the evening (Yes, there were a few!) were having unexpected people call to make sure we were okay and offer help and the large numbers of neighbors that were wandering the streets making sure everyone was ready to go. It is nice to know that those that live closest to us are watching out for everyone.

The boys were wide awake and quaking in their beds for hours. I finally had Nathan climb in with Matthew and by about eleven thirty, all three had fallen asleep due to sheer exhaustion and with many assurances that everything would be alright and if we had to leave Kev and I would never leave without them.

As I was finally going to bed to try to sleep, the fire crested the ridge closest to our house and began to burn downward. Kev opted to withhold this info from me until this morning knowing that if I knew there would be no sleep for this is the stuff that nightmares are made of . . . literally. What little sleep I got was peppered by dreams of smoke and flames.

12:15 a.m.

12:30 a.m.-Still moving quickly, the fire is making its way down the ridge closest to our house.

We feel very blessed this afternoon. Not only did our house not burn down, but we did not have to evacuate and the direction of the wind was such that our house doesn’t even smell like smoke. Houses just a few streets over took the brunt of the smoke and even the closest Smith's was horribly smoky smelling this morning. Although the wind fueled the fire and created a lot of the problem, it also blew most of the smoke away quickly so my two asthmatics haven't even had any problems. There have been planes and helicopters flying over our house all day as they work to extinguish what is left of the fire, but for now we are out of harm's way. In the end, the closest evacuation line was nine houses up the road from us so it was close. It was too stinkin’ close.

9:30 a.m.-Both ridges behind our house are blackened except for one small green spot that somehow managed to survive the night. The remaining spots that are still burning are just out of sight to the left.

So, how was your weekend?

A Trio Of Green Thumbs

In spite of all the trauma my garden has endured this season, we have still managed to reap some of the benefits of our labors. We ate lots of lettuce (until the deer finished it off for us), have had a few tomatoes (they are slow to ripen and the deer have nibbled them as well), and today the boys picked the first of their carrots. Daniel and Nathan both got some nice big ones.



Matthew's were a bit on the small side which is not a surprise considering they have been severely shaded by the beans he insisted on planting right next to the carrots. But he picked his first three green beans today as well so he didn't mind the small carrots.


He just got right to work snapping his beans so he could eat them for lunch.


Now they are hoping that the few pumpkins that have grown will have enough time to mature before the garden freezes. I'm thinking it's not likely, but considering that it is mid September and still ninety degrees every day, who knows?

Baby Steps

Today Matthew actually stood in the pink rectangle. Of course, as soon as he realized where he was he took a couple quick sidesteps to get away from the pink, nevertheless, it's progress.