Anyone
who knows me knows that I’m not a particularly athletic person. I can dance and
I can play volleyball a little bit, but besides that I’m pretty useless. As
such, P.E. was always the class I dreaded. I absolutely hated having to run the
mile and a half knowing that I would be the last person to finish. Those
classroom weigh ins and such were humiliating. And having to hang from the chin
up bar in front of everyone knowing full well that I was never going to get my
chin anywhere even remotely close to the bar was sheer torture.
So
you can imagine my dismay when I got called down to the counselor’s office just
after registration for 9th grade and was told that due to the number
of classes I was taking that were only taught during one period, the only P.E.
class available for me was the class reserved for the girls’ basketball team.
They had talked to the teacher and explained my situation. She had agreed that
I could take P.E. at that time and could adjust to my abilities. To me, it
seemed like just about the worst thing that could ever happen. But I wasn’t
about to drop orchestra or one of my accelerated classes so I could take P.E.
with the normal people. So I ponied up and agreed that it was a workable
solution.
P.E.
that year was one humiliation on top of another. Not only was I still the last
one to finish the 1.5 mile run, but I was out there by myself for at least
twenty minutes after the rest of the class went in. Not only could I not make a
basket to save my life, but I didn’t even know the rules for basketball. The
only unit where I didn’t feel like a complete dork was aerobics. Only then did
my ability to be graceful put me just one step above all those Amazons. Now
don’t get me wrong. Those girls were nice to me. They never teased me or treated
me like crap. But we weren’t exactly friends either. It was a pretty miserable
situation. One of the only perks was the fact that Cassidy, one of my best
friends since kindergarten who lived just around the block, was in another
accelerated gym class for the same reasons I was. She was marginally more
athletic than I was, but not much. So at least I had someone to commiserate
with.
Flash
forward to the end of the year. As usual, I was invited to the end of year
awards ceremony. That was not a big surprise for me. Neither were the majority
of the awards I received. I think I received an award for orchestra and English
that year. I know there were others, but honestly I can only remember for
certain one specific award. As they got ready to announce the award for
outstanding girl in P.E., I pretty much tuned out. I mean, there was no way I
was getting that award. So after they announced my name, I just sat there for a
minute. And then I started laughing. Right out loud. And my parents were
sitting in the audience laughing. I walked up to receive my award, still
laughing, and then they announced the winner of the second outstanding girls’
P.E. award. It was Cassidy. And then there were two sets of parents laughing.
I’m sure everyone there thought they were the worst parents ever. But they
weren’t. They were just as incredulous as their two academically inclined
daughters. After the fact, we were told that we were chosen to receive those
awards not because we were the best female athletes in our grade, but because
we had tried the hardest to do the best we could in a tough situation. Only
then did just a little bit of pride join the overwhelming humor of the event.
So
there you have it. Most surprised I’ve ever been. And honestly, one of the
funniest moments in my life.
